Airing Dirty Laundry

for all the world wide web to see

Let’s dust off this here blog July 8, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — airingdirtylaundry @ 9:28 pm

Where have I been, you ask?

All over the place, except for right here on my blog. This is my ninth post of the year so far. Shameful, isn’t it? With all of the running around, working, cleaning, laundry, etc. that goes on in life, I’ve found that I’m having trouble carving out the little bit of time it takes to write about said life. Too busy living it, I guess.

So I’m not going to promise to do better, because I doubt that I will. In the midst of working 50-55 hours a week, taking care of Maggie and the house (and Mike), running around on the weekends, etc, time is so limited, and blogging will always take a back seat. Which is a shame, since I wanted to use this blog (in part) to record all of the precious moments of Maggie’s life, all of the big milestones, plus all of the little things. Well, folks, it’s obviously not happening!

Speaking of Maggie, she’s 10 months old today. Amazing. It’s getting harder and harder to leave her in the morning. It used to be that she’d get up early, eat, and then fall asleep on the couch with Mike for awhile. Now she’s playing and crawling around when I leave for work in the morning, and I just want to scoop her up and take her with me.

Everyone we’re around comments on what a happy, pleasant baby she is. Something I totally take for granted. You mean all babies don’t always wake up happy?  Even when they’re startled awake? That they don’t melt down when they spend the afternoon of the Fourth of July without a nap? They don’t all love splashing in the pool?

She makes me laugh every day. When I try to get her to say “mama”, she gently whispers it. And then yells “dada” at the top of her lungs. When she gives her Ernie doll her pacifier. When she dances whenever she hears music –any music—a toy, a commercial, the radio. When I put a bunch of toys in a bucket and she gets mad and dumps them all out.

I need those laughs. I look forward to those laughs. I’m still struggling with the post-partum depression (or maybe just regular ol’ run-of-the-mill depression?) that crippled me earlier this year. I made the decision to take myself off of my meds, pull myself out of therapy, and do it my own way. Figure out how to get better on my own. About ten days after I stopped the anti-depressants, I felt better. More aware. More in control. Less fuzzy. Less numb. I knew I had made the right choice. So I just take each day as it comes, and do what I have to do to get by. I’m slowly learning how to get rid of the overwhelmedness (not a word, I know) that was weighing on me. I’m slowly learning to concentrate on the smaller tasks that make up the big picture instead of looking at the big picture and not having any idea of how to get where I need to be from where I am. And it’s working. Not 100%. Not foolproof. But hopefully the little baby steps that I’m taking will lead me in the right direction.

But enough about that.

We have a couple of busy months coming up . . .my brother’s wedding next weekend, a big work event that I’ve been planning for months, my father-in-law’s 60th birthday party, a trip to NJ to see Mike’s cousins, and Maggie’s first birthday bash. It will all go by quickly, I know.  Maybe I’ll get a chance to blog about it.  Maybe not.  We’ll see.

Here’s some pictures to tide you over until next time . . .

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Catching up . . .in pictures May 15, 2010

Filed under: baby!,daily grind,family,Uncategorized — airingdirtylaundry @ 9:25 pm

So, even though it’s been awhile (since Easter!), I really don’t have the gumption to string sentences together and make a coherent post right now.  Mike, Maggie, and I had a full day cleaning the house, taking a long walk, going for a run (OK, Mike and Maggie didn’t participate in that one and HOLY CRAP CAN YOU BELEIVE I STARTED RUNNING AGAIN?), and all of the other usual weekend-y type stuff.

Oh, and I cooked dinner today.  That in and of itself is newsworthy.  WITH MORE THAN 3 INGREDIENTS.  WITHOUT A RECIPE.  (I have friends in Seattle and Phoenix who just fell off their chairs when they read that).  I made pasta with zucchini, crab meat, spinach, and mozzarella, with a little bit of garlic, drizzled in olive oil, and topped with almond slivers.  It kicked ass, if I may say so myself.

Maggie is . . . mind-blowing.  It seems like every day she’s learning something new.  Some of her favorite things are waving, clapping, doing “so big”, peek-a-boo, “gimme five”, and dancing.  She LOVES to dance.  And, if I may say so, I think she inherited her dancing skills from me.  (Poor girl!)

Anyhow, here’s some pictures to tide you over until I come up with a real post.

 

Octoberfest October 4, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — airingdirtylaundry @ 11:20 am

Yesterday was a beautiful day–almost 70 degrees, sunny, with just a little bit of a breeze.  Mike, Maggie, and I met up with his Dad and Mary, and also JLo and AT at an Octoberfest that was held in the community that Mike grew up in.  It was a really small festival (and by small, I mean that they didn’t serve beer, which is what I have always equated Octoberfest with).

Maggie got to see the Pirate Parrot (probably for the first of many many times!),

but she slept through just about everything–once again, I had to wake her up to feed her!  The combination of fresh air and her love of the car seat seem to have a magical effect. 

So we headed home, still asleep . . .

 

I’m officially a “mommyblogger” September 16, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — airingdirtylaundry @ 11:05 pm

As much as I hate the term, I’m now officially a “mommyblogger”.  Now that Maggie has joined our family after such a long wait, she’s quickly taken over every aspect of our lives–and we love every minute of it!

I have a million blog posts swimming around in my head, including her birth story, but I’m running a little short on time and also have no inclination to spend time on the internet when I could instead be staring in amazement at my beautiful little girl.  So bear with me!

 

ABC June 30, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — airingdirtylaundry @ 8:01 pm

I stole this one from TheAngelForever.  Feel free to join in!

A – An advantage you have – Job security, at least to an extent.

B – Blue or brown eyes – Blue

C – Chore you hate
– cleaning the bathroom.  And the kitchen.  And the rest of the house.

D – Dad’s name – Larry (not the cable guy or the crash-test dummy)

E – Essential start of your day
– shower and get ready for work

F – Favorite color – Red

G – Greatest thing you’ve ever done that made you feel really good – working with Mike to run the American Cancer Society benefit each year.  It will never get old or be a chore.

H – Habit you have – glossing over important issues because I don’t want to deal with them.

I – Issue you hate that the world tries to make you pursue – Religion (I’m right there with ya, TheAngelForever!)

J – Job title – On paper?  Sales.  In reality?  Jack of all trades, babysitter, crisis management coordinator, and voice of reason.  (It was a long day at work today)

K – Kohls or Target – Target.  Wish there was one a little closer to us.

L – Living arrangements – Mike and I, two cats, and a baby on the way

M – Music you like
– Just about anything, depending on my mood.

N – Nicknames – Don’t really have any. 

O – Overnight hospital stay
– Tonsilectomy at age 7, Appendectomy in 2003

P – Pet Peeve – right now it’s people that tell me everything that went wrong during their childbirth experiences

Q – Quote that you like most –  “People who know little are usually great talkers, while men who know much say little”—Jean Jacques Rousseau

R – Right or left handed – Right handed

S – Siblings – A baby brother.  He’ll be 30 in August, so I guess he’s not much of a baby anymore.

T – Time you wake up – I sleep in as much as I can now that I’m pregnant—I don’t get up until 6:15 during the week.  Usually 7:00 on weekends.

U – Underwear – Yes, please.

V – Vegetable you dislike – I think I like them all.  Is that weird?

W – What makes you run late – Traffic is the only thing I can think of.  It’s more likely that I’m early for something rather than late.

X – X-rays you’ve had – Teeth, foot, ankles, collarbone

Y – Yummy food you make
– If “make” means “dial the phone and have delivered”, the possibilities are endless!

Z – Zoo animal – I love the giraffes!  And the reptile house is always interesting.

 

Breakdown June 26, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — airingdirtylaundry @ 5:41 pm

Baby, breakdown, go ahead give it to me

Breakdown, honey take me through the night

Breakdown, I’m standing here, can you see?

Breakdown, it’s all right

It’s all right

It’s all right

Just about every time I see or hear the word “breakdown”, I think of Tom Petty. And I like Petty, so it’s all good.

Except for 4:30 this morning, when I had my first pregnancy breakdown. Hours later, in the light of day, it seems trivial and, well, petty (pun TOTALLY intended). But in the darkness of night, an hour before dawn was ready to break, I fell apart.

I went to sleep at 10:30 last night, dutifully on my left side, sharing my king-size pillow with a sprawling 10lb Guinness, as comfortable as one can be nine and a half weeks away (Or less. Or more.) from giving birth. Even though we were in the midst of a pretty bad thunderstorm, I was tired. We had spent half an hour at our local Wal*Mart that evening, 29 minutes more than was really necessary, and if any place in the world can drain the life energy out of me, Wal*Mart can.

I don’t sleep as well, or as deeply, or as long, as I used to. My days of being able to pass out for hours with lights blazing, TV or music blaring, and in uncomfortable positions seem to be over. And I’m OK with that. In theory, at least. So when I woke up at midnight or so and talked to Mike (who was still awake, in the dark, watching a very muted TV), it took me a little while to get back into a deep sleep. And when I woke up at 1:30 because a certain cat’s paw was too close for comfort to my eye socket, it took me a little while longer. And when I woke up at 3:00 for seemingly no reason at all, I couldn’t fall back asleep. Mike was snoring, although not loudly, but it was all I could concentrate on. After a few pokes to his rib cage that he failed to acknowledge, I grabbed my body pillow and water bottle and headed downstairs to the couch. A common enough scenario for me anymore, and usually I can fall back asleep at least for a little while.

I got myself comfortable on the cold (ahhhhh) leather of the couch in the family room, closed my eyes, and waited for blissful rest to come my way. Seconds later, I heard the tell-tale thump of Forrest knocking something off of the island in the kitchen. I squeezed my eyes a little tighter and tried to will myself to sleep. A few minutes passed, and I heard him in the dining room, playing with the glasses that hang from our wine rack. I got up, turned the lights on, grabbed him off the wine rack, tapped him on the nose, called him a bad cat, turned the lights off, and laid back down.

Five minutes later, he was at it again. In a loud whisper, I said “Forrest!”, and he stopped. He got back up on the counter, and used the weight of his body to push my purse off onto the hardwood floor. No small feet for a scrawny one year old cat.

Not getting a reaction out of me, he walked into the family room, got on the coffee table, knocked my phone (which I had the alarm set on) off onto the floor and played hockey with it across the hardwood and into the kitchen. Of course, I was lying there wondering where he would hide it and imagining that I would miraculously fall asleep and then be late for work.

I once again grabbed my body pillow and water bottle, retrieved my phone, and, as Forrest trounced back upstairs, I shut myself into the room that is supposed to be our formal living room but is more of a den. The room is dark red, the blinds were shut, and only a little light was coming through the windows of the French doors. I laid down on the couch, settled in, and maybe even fell asleep for 5 or 10 minutes. Until Forrest figured out that the only thing separating him from me were those doors. He, at first, gently pushed at the doors, making them rattle. His pushing increased until he was throwing his little cat shoulder into the doors, trying to use his body weight to push them open. He’s very persistent.

I packed up my stuff and went upstairs to one of the spare bedrooms, and although he didn’t follow me, I couldn’t get comfortable on that bed. And I was cranky by that point, which makes getting comfortable a teensy bit harder. So I moved to the other spare room, shut the door, swept the mess of clothes off the bed, and threw myself down. It was 4:30.

The first time I heard Forrest in the hallway outside the room, the tears started. I knew there was no chance now that I would fall back asleep. Within seconds I was sobbing uncontrollably. I knew I had an intense day at work ahead of me, and knew that I would have trouble being “on” for nine straight hours after such a restless night.

I cried until my eyes were swollen and the tears eventually dried up.

All the while, I could hear Forrest pacing in the hallway, trying to figure out how to get to me. I felt like I was in the movie Jaws, in a cage in the ocean, a shark swimming laps around me, smelling blood, anxious to make his move.

Having exhausted the options of the two couches and two spare beds, I gave up and went back to our bedroom, climbed into bed, laid my head down on the edge of my king-size pillow that Guinness allowed me to have, and closed my eyes. The tears started anew, not racking sobs this time, but enough to wake my (still snoring!) husband, who talked to me, hugged me, and calmed me down. Forrest, meanwhile, leapt onto the dresser, weaseled his way through the curtains, and rattled the blinds when he stuck his head through them so that he could look out the window.

The sun was up. I fell asleep around 6:00, and my alarm went off at 6:15. Time to get up.

I showered, forced my contacts into my swollen red eyes, got myself ready for work, and stopped for a second on my way out the door to pet Forrest, who was passed out cold on the couch. As annoyed as I was with him, I still love him. But couldn’t resist a small poke to stir him awake.

Sure, I’m still tired, and my eyes are still puffy with dark circles underneath, but I got through the day by thinking that at least I could go home after work and lay down for an hour or two. And the baby was really active today, so my mood improved with each movement, each kick, each scrape of an arm or leg as he or she flipped and turned.

Breakdown, it’s all right

It’s all right

It’s all right

Good night.

 

Crazy weekend! June 9, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — airingdirtylaundry @ 7:21 pm

JLo’s bachelorette party was this past Friday and her bridal shower was on Sunday.  Add a baby shower on Saturday, and we had quite a weekend!

JLo’s bachelorette party was a lot of fun.  It was great to see her having such a good time with all of her friends, and although there was a lot of beer and shots involved, nothing got out of hand and JLo was barely even hungover the next day. 

She was quite a sport with all of the traditional bachelorette party garb.

And she had a good time dancing!

I will admit that being the sober pregnant one at a bachelorette party was a new experience for me, but I had such a great time!

The bridal shower was also a lot of fun.  JLo got a lot of really nice gifts and it made me realize that her wedding is just 2 short months away.  Time is just flying by!